


FML

by E__E



Category: Shadowhunter Chronicles - All Media Types, Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: ALL ABOARD THE ANGST TRAIN, AU, Alcohol Abuse/Alcoholism, Angst, Canon Divergent, Clizzy - Freeform, Clubbing, Depressed Alec, Drug Use, F/F, F/M, Fluff, Fluff and Angst, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Malec, Partying, Supportive Izzy, and toilsome, depressed Magnus, party boy Magnus, repressed alec, show verse, tagging is hard, trigger warning
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2016-08-22
Updated: 2016-11-05
Packaged: 2018-08-10 07:44:59
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 5,611
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7836124
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/E__E/pseuds/E__E
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Magnus Bane, The High Warlock of Brooklyn... is practically a household name among downworlders and shadowhunters alike.<br/>Notorious and adored all at once, Magnus is famed, respected, and lives in leisure.<br/>When he isn’t working or fulfilling his duties as a High Warlock, he’s throwing extravagant parties. Fine wine and even finer food, sweeping across dance floors, adventures across the globe -  he experiences all the thrills anyone could ever ask for, not too mention his powerful magical abilities.<br/>But there is much more than what meets the eye...<br/>(I put the rest of the summary in the notes, as it was too long to fit here- oops)<br/>This is in show verse, but is still an au in which Valentine and The Circle are long gone.<br/>Trigger Warning: Themes of mental illness, alcoholism and drug use. If any of these things upset you, please do not read, I would never want to trigger anyone.<br/>I hope you enjoy!!!</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. 'Bad Things'

**Author's Note:**

> Magnus Bane, The High Warlock of Brooklyn... is practically a household name among downworlders and shadowhunters alike.  
> Notorious and adored all at once, Magnus is famed, respected, and lives in leisure.  
> When he isn’t working or fulfilling his duties as a High Warlock, he’s throwing extravagant parties. Fine wine and even finer food, sweeping across dance floors, adventures across the globe - he experiences all the thrills anyone could ever ask for, not too mention his powerful magical abilities.  
> But there is much more than what meets the eye.  
> Hiding behind his legendary persona, Magnus is secretly sinking into a growing depression, and the past decade had been a complete roller coaster of reckless behavior, alcoholism, and even drug use.  
> His friends desperately try to help, but Magnus is in denial - avoiding the truth and sinking deeper and deeper into his sadness that leads him to take self destructive actions that not only hurt himself, but also his loved ones.  
> Alec Lightwood, The Shadowhunter… is the big brother, the fierce warrior and the steady voice of reason. Completing and leading missions, managing the New York Institute alongside his parents, and taking care of his wild siblings - Alec is the ideal shadowhunter. But behind his calm, steady headed disposition, Alec feels like he is about to explode. The rules Alec follows so diligently constrain him, all the responsibilities and expectations The Clave, well as his parents hold for him have him in a choke hold. Although he’s somewhat come to terms with his sexuality, he still doesn’t know how to process or deal with his own emotions, and casts all his feelings aside.  
> His selflessness is eating away at him, damaging his self esteem and ability to reach out to others.  
> He puts up a front of aloofness and rarely questions orders - even if he wants to.  
> The only person who sees through his resolve is Isabelle, his intelligent and compassionate sister. Izzy desperately wants Alec to open up and take charge of his own life. She sees his unhappiness and constantly tries to convince him to think of his own well being and change the way he sees himself, but Alec never listens, and continues to live in a self made bubble. 
> 
> Both Magnus and Alec are stuck, both unable and/or unwilling to break free of their self constructed prisons.  
> When the two cross paths they feel an immediate connection.  
> Could they help each other learn and grow?  
> Or will their mutual sufferings plunge them even further into the strongholds of their constraints?

 "Magnus!" Ragnor entered his beloved friend's loft, proceeding with caution from the opening room  to the living room. Hearing no reply made him nervous - not to mention that the door to the loft  was left unlocked, and his magical wards were down.

When Ragnor received a frantic (quite possible drunken) text from Magnus at 3:45 am, he disregarded it as nothing new, the past ten years had been a complete mess, no thanks to his dear friend, his dear friend who... 

 _Damn it Magnus._                                              

Magnus, The High Warlock of Brooklyn, was collapsed on a velvet loveseat (Ragnor bought that for  him by the way) surrounded by empty liquor bottles, cigarette butts, blunts, and - was that vomit? The best part of course, were the trashed strangers who were also crowded onto the loveseat. Ragnor was pretty sure that loveseats were constructed for two people to sit on.

Ragnor felt dizzy counting the amount of entangled limbs Magnus was encompassed in. He cleared his throat loudly. No response.He cleared his throat again. Still, no response from  anyone. Ragnor sighed and called upon his magic.  

An achingly high pitch resounded across the room.

There was a collective groan among the group of wasted post-party goers, the loudest and most obnoxious of course, being Magnus.

"I have other things that need attending to on this fine day, so Magnus, if you would show these... lovely guests to the door, it would be much appreciated."

Magnus mumbled something unintelligible, and groggily lifted one arm to snap his fingers. All of the guests were instantly cleaned up, looking pristine and ready for the day.

One man among them did not agree with Magnus's choice of clothing for them "Uhm, dude - what's with the glitter?" Magnus did not lift his head to answer him (his face was smushed into a pillow), and snapped his fingers again, this time to open the door.

The man got the message, and stumbled along with the rest of the group exiting the loft, onto the streets of Brooklyn.  As soon as they were gone, Ragnor dove right in.

"So you have no problem cleaning up all those strangers, but can't even do so for yourself?"  

"Fuck off Ragnor." "And why should I do that?"

"It's too early in the morning for this." Ragnor stared at Magnus, incredulous. 

"Magnus, it's three in the afternoon."

"Oh, really?" Magnus rose his head up from the pillow, and wiped drool off of his chin. Sitting up and crossing his legs elegantly, he waved his hand dismissively at Ragnor

"I bet you're just saying that to watch me get worked up. It won't work you know, we aren't 200 years old anymore." Ragnor scoffed, forcing down a clever retort.

"Check your watch."

Realizing that Ragnor was correct, and that it was indeed three in the afternoon, Magnus face palmed and groaned loudly. "Ugh," "Yes, that sums it up quite well."

Ragnor smiled. Magnus glared at him."You are the most annoying person I know." "Me? Magnus, you are a nuisance."

Ragnor's expression softened at the sight of his closest friend pouting.

"Go clean yourself up, we'll get break... I mean brunch when you're finished."

"Thank you for looking after me. You're still the most annoying person I know."

And with that, Magnus lifted himself off of the loveseat (he wobbled a little but Ragnor pretended not to notice), and made his way to the bathroom. 

 _This idiot will be the death of me._  

Ragnor was trying very hard not to let it show how much it hurt to see his best friend in this state.

Magnus was quite possibly the most intelligent person Ragnor knew. Always the clever one, the one who made innovations in all things magic, the influential powerful, natural born leader Magnus really was at heart - was being buried.  

At the surface, Magnus still appeared to be himself. But for those who truly knew him, they had watched for the past ten, nearing eleven years as Magnus slowly descended into a black spiral of self destructive, reckless behavior.

Magnus was always the #1 party boy - but this had been a whole new level of crazy. Ever since - Ragnor's thoughts were interrupted when Magnus re-entered the living room.

He was wearing one of his milder outfits. A red button up shirt with an embroidered pattern of flowers on the sleeves and collar, paired with simple black dress pants and his signature ear cuff.

"Ready to go whenever you are!" Magnus smiled - the tired worn down smile he always seemed to wear these days.                                                                          

Ragnor made sure to lock the door when they left - Magnus would forget.

***

Magnus had seized to be embarrassed of his wild behavior awhile ago. Maybe his life had gone to hell - whatever. He had still been able to keep up with all the work.                

Taking care of his fellow warlocks, making potions and spells for clients, and the hardest one - managing peace treaties and meetings with the nephilim and downworlders.

He'd still been able to do all those things  _(And with great finesse, thank you very much)._

So who cares if he drinks a tad much? or throws/goes to parties every other day? He's still diligently working. He looked across the table at Ragnor. 

_He cares. And Catarina._

They were sitting in the outside section of Magnus's favorite café. He personally knew the owner, a petite french woman who had a passion for baking and fine coffee. He had supplied her with charms that sped up cleaning and cooking for years now - he always got discounts.

"It's always so cozy here, isn't it?" Magnus attempted to open up casual conversation - Ragnor was not in a talkative mood. He never was very bubbly, but he was especially stormy today. "What's the matter?"

Ragnor didn't answer, but stared at the colorful table cloth, pointedly ignoring Magnus. So, Magnus kicked his shins under the table.

"Talk to me you undignified cabbage."

Ragnor sighed, "You're what's the matter my friend."

"Now don't be dramatic, that's my niche." "Stop playing dumb with me!" Ragnor exclaimed. 

_That was harsh._

"You're acting like an impudent child, can't you see that me and Catarina are concerned for you?"

Magnus opened his mouth to say something, but he wasn't sure what to say.

"I - ah..."  _I never stutter._ "I appreciate that Ragnor, really, I do." Ragnor raised his eyebrows, skeptical.

"But I can assure you that I am absolutely fine." "You are not fine, and you know it."

Magnus's eyes, un-glamoured, shone with vulnerability. 

"I don't know how to stop."

Magnus was about to say more, when their food and coffee arrived. "My god, you ordered so much!" Ragnor exclaimed. "Yea well, hangovers are bitches."

Ragnor chuckled, "Eat away, pig." Magnus pretended to be insulted. "I can't believe you're my best friend."

They both laughed it off, Magnus was relieved that the earlier tension had dissipated a bit.

"We still need to talk about this." Magnus swallowed, "Okay. But I'm busy today." Ragnor rolled his eyes in exasperation.

"You know how it is, High Warlock duties and such." This had become the usual thing. Magnus avoiding any sort of deep conversation with even his closest friends.

For the past decade, he felt the walls that he had crushed so long ago begin to creep back up again.

Ten years shouldn't feel so long to an immortal, but here he was, this unnamed weight pressing down on him - extending time and snapping him apart.

Despite his two closest friends living so close by - and the countless acquaintances who doted on him, he hadn't felt this lonely since his early days in Indonesia.                        

"Is it because of Camille?" Magnus shook his head. "No, I've recovered from all that nearly seventy years ago. It's not Camille."

She had attended the same party as Magnus a few days ago after a very, very long time with zero contact. To his own surprise, Magnus was unfazed, and simply passed by her without a glance.

He had no idea what this loneliness, this pain was, or anything of it's origin. What did you do last night?”

_So many questions._

"Well if you really must know, I held a celebration at my loft.” “Yea okay, I believe I am well aware of that.”

Magnus laughed, Ragnor went on.

_Here we go._

“You wise ass… Was there even a cause for celebration!? Why did you hold it at your own home, you own a club for goodness sake - and what led to you to collapse on the loveseat I bought you for your birthday last year - in case you forgot, surrounded by strangers!?- some of them were mundanes! And marijuana? Was that really necessary? - what’s next, pharmaceuticals?”

Magnus laughed harder, to the point he was nearly cracking up.

“I don’t know, when isn’t there a cause for celebration? You are such a prude.”    

Magnus looked at Ragnor and stifled another laugh in order to speak more. I’m not 100% sure what happened last night, but it was exciting to say the least." Magnus beamed with false pride.

Ragnor pointed an accusatory finger at him. “You, will be the death of me.” 

They spent the rest of brunch with the usual banter, enjoying the food and the coffee, until Magnus’s phone rang, alerting him of the monthly meeting with the shadowhunters and the downworlders.

“See, High Warlock duties.” Ragnor smiled at him. “Well, off you go then. I’ll call you later.”

"No you won’t.”

***  

Magnus was on his way to the New York Institute. During his commute, he thought of their earlier conversation. Magnus had spoken of his troubles more than usual. He actually told Ragnor that he wasn’t sure how to stop.

 _I don’t think I’ve ever said that before._                                                                                                                              

But what exactly was it exactly that he couldn’t stop? He shook his head, it wasn’t the time to think of his own personal problems.

Meetings with The Clave were always intimidating. Add in the entire down world and you've got a horror show.

Magnus had been alive for a very long time, but he had never been immune to fear - and The Clave were very skillful at inspiring fear.  

But the meetings were important - The Clave (mostly made up of insolent, conservative bores) were slowly learning to respect downworlders.

Downworlders were slowly learning to set apart their differences and work together in order to deal with The Clave’s rules and policies. Changing the laws of The Accords was toilsome, but immensely important.

Magnus hated to admit it, but The Accords kept order in the shadow world and downworld alike.

But Magnus, and every group involved wanted more than order. They wanted peace and equality.

The nephilim had dominated the law for centuries now, it was definitely time for change.

Magnus was pondering all of this, prepping himself for the harshness of The Clave and the downworlders.  

But he was still not able entirely get rid of his own troubles swimming around in his head.

He did remember some of what happened last night.

Only bits and pieces.

Being dragged into his own bedroom by two attractive strangers. They were Fae, he remembered that - but he couldn’t remember exactly what they looked like.              

Dancing, at first to obnoxious club music, and then to silence when the speakers blew out.

Mixing endless drinks, and laughing a lot without really meaning it, and playing stupid stripping games and trashing his own home.

He remembered smoking, and then everything going fuzzy and blacking out.

He did not know how he ended up on the loveseat.

By now he had arrived at the steps of the towering New York Institute.

He pushed all the memories away, it’s wasn’t the time for that. _Here goes nothing._

He entered through the ancient doors, readying himself for what was to come.


	2. Mr.Blue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The Institute prepares for the meeting, Alec is stressed as hell.

He’d been on edge all day. Not to say that he hasn’t been on edge all month - but today especially was a whirlwind of stress.

The monthly peace negotiations and meetings discussing The Accords were this evening, around 5 pm. Alec never sat in on these meetings despite practically running the institute alongside his parents for the past three years. His parents - damn them, did not believe he was ready.

 _Which is utter bullshit, how can they say_ _something so contradictory?_

Alec knew that being a shadowhunter meant putting other’s safety above your own, that following orders and working diligently was the core of what it meant to be a shadowhunter.                                                                                                                                                                                                    

But it still hurt to know that his parents had no problem putting himself in harm’s way, but did not trust him enough to directly be involved with something so important to him.

Izzy and Alec had always hated the prejudiced way The Clave viewed and treated Downworlders. Jace was rather indifferent.

But Alec would never defy his parent’s wishes - at least not openly.

Anyhow, today was his first time attending a meeting, and he was extremely nervous.

His parents were probably even more on edge than him, prepping everyone in the institute for the meeting, and getting the Boardroom ready to accommodate the council members of The Clave, and the representatives for all the Downworlders.

He was able to convince his parents let Izzy join in - which was quite a feat, as they didn’t treat Izzy with nearly enough respect, or trust her to take responsibility like they do with Alec.

_Which is also total bullshit._

Izzy was the kindest, and most reliable person he knew. Despite her somewhat wild nature, Alec trusted her more than anyone - maybe even more than his parabatai, Jace. Which is saying a lot.

Maryse had refused to let Jace sit in, Alec reluctantly agreed that he would definitely be a bit… disrespectful towards The Clave and Downworlders alike.

It was nearing the time of the meeting, and Alec was growing increasingly nervous. He knew that he wouldn’t have much of a say in the decision making, but still... _What if I say something to embarrass myself? Or my family? What if Izzy pisses The Clave off, What if I jeopardize the peace negotiations, What if_ \- His irrational, worried thoughts were interrupted when he felt Jace’s hand on his shoulder.

“Hey, stop scowling like that, you’re practically radiating anxiety. I’m getting nervous just looking at you - and I’m not even going to the meeting.” Alec laughed, actively trying to relieve some tension.

"Thanks I guess.” “What do you mean ‘I guess?’ I’m a great comfort.”

Alec narrowed his eyebrows. “Uhm… If that helps you sleep at night.” “Rude.”

Alec truly laughed then at his parabatai’s scrunched up, offended expression.

“Anyways - what’re you even gonna do the entire time we’re in the meeting? It’s hours long.” “I don’t know, maybe I’ll train. Or go out and roam the streets of NYC.”

“Yea, alright, just don’t do anything crazy. I’d hate to tell Maryse you were out clubbing instead of working.”

Jace scoffed, “Whatever, it’s not like she’ll care.” Robert and Maryse were always far more lenient with Jace than Alec and Izzy.

Izzy walked in right then. “She would care, knucklehead.” She playfully shoved him, “Mother is especially tense today. I wouldn’t be surprised if she yelled at someone for having one strand of hair out of place. Speaking of which, Alec you need to change, that t-shirt is a crime against fashion!"

Alec rolled his eyes. “Sure, maybe later.”

Jace pouted, ignoring Izzy chastising Alec. “It’s been so long since we went out Izzy, I’m feeling so cooped up here.” “Yea… I know. We’re gonna see The High Warlock of Brooklyn today, I’ve heard that his parties are ah - ma -zing. I’ve also heard that he’s hot as hell - maybe we could take Alec!”

“Absolutely not.” Izzy sighed, “Well, I tried.”

Alec had heard of Magnus Bane before, hell everyone has. Not all good things, but then again - Alec had only heard of him through rumours and gossip.

_So that hardly counts as anything._

Nevertheless, it was exciting to know he would be introduced to someone so important in the Downworld.

They would also see Luke today, leader of the werewolves and Clary’s stepfather.

Izzy and Clary had started dating around two months ago, and Alec was happy for them. Well, mostly for Izzy.

When Clary - annoying but brave and hardworking, had arrived at the institute, the two had become very close very fast.

Her mother had fallen ill when a past minion of The Circle (which had been disbanded and destroyed before Clary was even born) attempted to poison her.

Jocelyn had fallen into a comatose, and Clary who had previously been unaware of her shadowhunter heritage, was suddenly thrown into their world.

Alec didn’t like her, not at first. She was whiny, stubborn and impulsive.

However, over the past three years Alec had witnessed as she trained hard - making up for years of lost practice, adjusting quickly to her new and alien surroundings.

She was adaptable and trustworthy. Over the past three years, she had certainly grown into a mature young adult, ready to face the world.

Although Alec and Clary got off to a shaky start, he really did appreciate her.

She made Izzy happy, and honestly - what else could he ask for?

He wasn’t at all surprised when Izzy and Clary announced that they were together, in fact, he was almost a bit relieved.

The romantic tension between them had been obvious since the start. He was also ecstatic when Izzy had seized all ties with Melieron.

Their relationship had been unstable, distracted Izzy from her missions - and messed with her emotional well being.

Clary made her happy. Alec was grateful for that. Clary, like Jace, was not allowed to go to the meeting. It would just be Alec and Izzy.

 _Here come the nerves again_.

“Alec! What’re you wearing?” _Judgemental minds think alike._

Clary was walking towards the trio, she gave Jace and Alec a hug before slinging her arms with Izzy’s. “Izzy, do something about him, or I will.”

Izzy laughed heartily, “Don’t worry babe, I definitely will.” “I’m offended.” “I’m sorry, but you really can’t go into such an important event wearing that.”

Izzy and Clary looked him up and down.

“Fine, just pick something for me then!” “Oh!” Izzy exclaimed, “Alec, I thought you’d never ask.”

She let go of Clary, “Alec and I need to get ready, but I’ll see you later.” She pecked Clary on the cheek and dragged Alec away.

 ***

Isabelle was worried.

Well, she was always worried about her brother. But she’d been especially worried the past few months.

He was eating less, and working more. He was acting way too old for his age, he never went out - did he even have friends outside of the Institute?

Izzy doubted it.

He was a good actor - Izzy had to hand it to him, if you didn’t pay too much attention, Alec appeared perfectly fine. But he wasn’t. Izzy knew that he really wasn’t.

She sighed and rummaged through her drawers, looking for a proper shirt for Alec.

She always bought clothes for him when she went out shopping for herself, Alec just refused to join everytime. Alec stood by the door, impatiently tapping his foot.

"Would you stop that? It’s very distracting.” “But you’re taking so long!” “Perfection takes time.”

“Well, it’s a meeting, not project runway.” Alec grumbled.

Izzy finally found the perfect shirt - a cobalt button down - blue was definitely Alec’s color.

“Here! Told ya I’d find something.”

She tossed the shirt along with some black jeans over to Alec.

He was about to leave in order to change, before Izzy decided last minute, that this had gone on long enough.

“Alec, we need to talk.” He stopped in his tracks. “What about?” “I'm just… I'm worried. You've been kinda off lately.”

“Izzy this is really not a good time, the meeting starts in like, thirty minutes.”

Alec was right, it wasn't a good time. But if not now, then when? “Well…”

She wasn't sure what to say.

How do you open this kind of conversation with someone who's so damn repressed?

Alec was always quiet - reserved. But he let Izzy in, he talked to her sometimes. But year after year he just closed himself off even more, from anyone and everyone, and he didn’t even see it.

“You’re hiding something, I know it.” “No - well, I mean…” Alec stared at her blankly. “I’m fine.”

“No you aren’t, and you know it.” A few tense seconds passed, as Izzy stared back at him, challenging him to tell the truth.

“I’m not happy. Is that what you want to hear?” “Alec-” “It doesn’t matter. It’s not my job to be happy. I’m fine Izzy, I’m fine.”

He stormed off, out of the room.

_That went well._

She had been planning to talk it out with him for ages, and she completely fucked up. Or he did, whatever.

It was a mistake to try right before the meeting.

_What the hell is wrong with him?_

It wasn’t his struggle with his sexuality. He’d kinda made peace with it awhile ago. When Izzy started dating Clary, her parents just ignored it. Being lgbt didn’t affect their ability to be good shadowhunters.

So as long as their relationships didn’t distract them - their parents were okay.

Alec told their parents he was gay soon after - they honestly didn’t care. So it wasn’t that.

Maybe he was just lonely - but he had always kept to himself.

Izzy heard a knock at the door, and turned to see Clary standing there. “Hey, everything okay? I just saw Alec storming away with an even bigger scowl on his face than usual.”

Izzy chuckled, “Oh, I don’t know. It’s complicated I guess.”

Clary moved to sit down next to Izzy on the bed."You’re worried, aren’t you?”

"Yea, it’s just… he looks so miserable lately. I just want him to be happy.”

Clary sighed, “Same here Iz. But honestly, I think he needs to work things out on his own.”

“You know he won’t - he’s way too stubborn to deal with it. I don’t think he even knows what’s wrong himself.”

Clary rested her head on Izzy’s shoulder.

“I know he’s your brother, but take care of yourself too. I hate seeing you upset. It will be okay, he’s strong. You both are.”

She gave Izzy a wide smile and kissed her.

“Thank you, I needed that.” “The pep talk or the kiss?” “A bit of both.”

Clary giggled pushed her down on the bed and then lay next to her. Not saying anything or doing anything, just enjoying the other’s company in a comfortable silence.

Isabelle was worried.

But here with Clary, she forgot her troubles for awhile.

How could she even begin to describe Clary? So many synonyms for the world beautiful danced across Izzy’s mind.

_Words aren’t good enough._

She gazed at Clary, whose eyes were shut and hands subconsciously running through Izzy’s hair.

Izzy went to kiss her again, savoring the warmth and calm that came with each kiss.

In less than thirty minutes, Izzy would have to leave and sit next to a tense Alec, surrounded by even tenser Clave and Downworlder representatives for over two hours. But she was calm, she felt ready.

Isabelle was worried, but she could do this.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hope you enjoyed reading!  
> Next up: The peace negotiations, and Magnus and Alec meet for the first time.  
> Title taken from 'Mr Blue by Catherine Feeny."


	3. Of First Meetings

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Alec and Magnus meet for the first time

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I haven't updated this in months... oops...  
> This is a short chapter but I hope you enjoy anyhow!

 

The shuffling footsteps, papers and the sound of chairs squeaking across the hardwood floors made Alec even more nervous. Izzy and Alec had come early, which felt like a huge mistake as the anticipation grew stronger and stronger with each new representative that entered the boardroom. It was exciting though, Alec had to admit. He knew the basics of how these work.

The Clave reads off rules and laws they wanted to enact or nullify, the whole table would discuss whether or not the law should be put into place, and then there would be an “election” in which people would say yes or no to the new law. It was really simple. But it took time. Creating new laws, or abolishing or modifying old ones was not simple. Each group had different goals and interests that often contridicted the others.

Alec knew these meetings could get heated, quickly and in extremity.

_But it’s worth it._

 

He sought out Izzy sitting next to him, she felt far away despite being so close.

“Relax mi hermano, it’ll be great.” She gave him a wide smile and squeezed his hand.

The chancellor stood at the front of the table and cleared her throat. “If everyone could please settle down and find their seats, we can begin.” Maryse walked by Izzy and Alec.

She placed a reassuring hand on his shoulder. “It’ll be okay Alec.” Alec was taken aback, his mother was not a very warm or nurturing person. She walked away to sit with Robert at the other side of the room before Alec had the chance to respond.

_Yea, I hope so._

 

***

Thirty minutes into the meeting and Magnus was already bored. They weren't discussing any major law changes today, and though he knew even minor laws were still  important, it couldn't change the fact that he was praying for this to end ASAP. He did, briefly, notice something interesting before the meeting began.

Alexander Lightwood.

Magnus had heard of him, even down worlders were impressed with his ability to run the New York institute. Some of them practically gushed over his ‘quiet but strong temperament’ and ‘outrageously good looks’. He didn't think much of it at the time, the Lightwood family and Magnus never got along too well. Maryse especially tested his patience.

 

But damn, no one was exaggerating when they spoke of Alexander’s beauty.

Though Magnus didn't get any more than a few seconds to observe him, he couldn't deny that Alexander was gorgeous. And another thing Magnus noted, is that he looked nervous.

A shy Lightwood? _Now that's a real sight to behold._

But Magnus decided it was a good idea to focus his attention on the meeting, and not the Lightwood boy ~ even if he’s practically the prettiest boy he had ever seen.

 

Thirty minutes bled into an hour, and Magnus was just about ready to fall asleep out of complete, utter boredom.

That is, until, the chancellor read off a particular law that sent Magnus’s heart racing and adrenaline pumping. The anger coursing through his body was indescribable.

***

 

“In accordance to the “Glamour Law” of The Original  Accords, all warlocks are required to hide their marks in public.”

Alec, Izzy, and all the warlocks present gasped in disbelief.

 

 _How the hell is that fair or okay!?_ Alec wished he had the guts to say something. Izzy gave Alec a incredulous look. Did she want him to say something? What the hell **_could_ ** he say?

 

The chancellor continued on, explains how Warlock’s must use a glamour or any other means possible to hide their marks.

 

“I object.”  A commanding yet velvety voice spoke out, interrupting her. Alec was amazed that someone would be so forward with The Inquisitor.

Alec looked towards the source of the voice, and was met with the striking eyes of Magnus Bane.

Alec had rarely if ever seen a warlock’s mark before, every warlock he’d ever met almost always  hid their mark. He was stunning. Somehow, without ever seeing Magnus before, Alec knew that this had to be him.

 

Magnus’s eyes were mixed with shades of yellow and emerald green - speckled with gold, his pupils slit like a cats.  His tanned skin glowed in the light of the chandelier.

His movements were precise and graceful. His expression was calm and controlled, but Alec saw passion in his narrowed eyebrows and tense shoulders. Magnus locked eyes with him briefly. Alec felt himself shiver and his cheeks flush. _Look away, look away please._ Alec saw a hint of a smirk on his lips, before he turned away from Alec, _thank god,_ back to the Inquisitor. He rose from his seat to speak.

 

“It is my duty as a High Warlock to ensure the safety and well being of every warlock in Brooklyn and beyond. If we were to enforce this rule - my fellow warlocks would never overcome their fear of you.” The Inquisitor’s eyes widened at his bluntness.

Alec heard mummers across the long table.

_So this is Magnus Bane. Holy shit._

 

To his surprise, The Inquisitor shushed them, “Please continue High Warlock Bane.”  

Magnus cleared his throat, “As I was saying, I’ve witnessed endless fear and oppression of warlocks over the centuries that The Clave has dominated the Downworld.

Forcing us to hide our marks propagates the notion that we are unnatural and meant to be alienated from the rest of the Downworld. The only time we should be required to glamour our marks is around mundanes.

You can’t expect us to work together when you spread these ideas, further bridging the gap that lies between unjust treatment and equality among all Downworlders and shadowhunters.” There were nods and hums of approval across the room -

Alec couldn’t help but crack  smile. He was impressed, more than impressed.

 

Magnus spoke so eloquently. He was bold, amazingly so.

But somehow, he could bend his words to challenge The Inquisitor in a courteous manner.

Alec could feel Magnus’s power and emotion in his every word. Alec was moved, deeply. He looked at Izzy sitting next to him and could she that she was also moved. She grinned at him with glistening eyes. “Very well.”, The Inquisitor said after a minute of contemplation.

“The law enforcing the glamour of warlock marks is abolished. Do The Council, The Vampires, Warlocks, Werewolves, and Fae agree to comply?”

There was a unanimous yes across the board.

 

Alec only saw one or two people shake their heads in disdain. Maryse looked conflicted, but she was still among the majority that said yes to the abolishment of the glamour law.

After that, Alec did not pay attention to the rest of the meeting. He hoped his parents didn’t notice. He was shaken - not in at all in a bad way. It’s just that - he’d never seen anyone like Magnus before.

He’d never seen someone so unique, so… _Beautiful._ Alec realized with a start.

He turned to look at Magnus across the room - only to find that Magnus was already looking at him.

 

 _Why would he be looking at me, of all people?_ Alec wasn’t particularly intriguing . He wasn’t bad looking either, sure. But what was interesting enough about him for Magnus to be looking at him like **_that_ **?

With so much intensity.

 

Magnus caught his eyes and smiled - it was sweet. Alec smiled back, still confused - but also excited. He looked down at his shoes, trying to conceal his excitement.

Was Magnus just being nice? He didn’t think so. That was more than just nice… that was… Alec didn’t know exactly. Alec looked back up.

_He’s still looking at me._

“Meeting Adjourned!” And just like that, everyone was rising out of there seats and hurriedly leaving the room. Except for Magnus.

 

Izzy stood up, and looked at both Alec and Magnus before reaching a conclusion. “Okay big brother, I’ll leave you to it - see you later.”

Alec opened his mouth to protest, _How the hell am I supposed to speak to him!?_

But Izzy was gone in a flash. The room was completely empty except for Magnus and Alec.

 

“Well, that was intense wasn’t it?” Magnus said.

Alec nodded slowly, not sure what to say.

“You’re uh- uhm, speech was beautiful.”   _Well that was direct_

“Why thank you! er… Alexander, isn’t it?” “Yes! How did you know?” Alec was too distracted by his own happiness that Magnus might know who he was -  he didn’t even say that he preferred ‘Alec’.  

“I heard you speaking with Maryse.” “Oh - cool.”

“I've heard that you're quite the leader figure, it's very impressive that a shadowhunter has such progressive views and a talent for running an entire institute at such a young age.” “ Um, thanks…I…”

Alec was at a loss for words. _He’s even more beautiful up close._

 

Magnus walked closer to him, until he was less than a foot away from Alec.

He leaned in, and slipped a paper into the front pocket of Alec’s jeans.

“My number, just in case you ever need a break from the institute.”

Magnus was so close. So unbearably close. Alec shivered.

“No need to be nervous Alexander, you don't need to call me if you don’t want to.”

“Oh, no I’m really happy you gave me your number, I'll uh - call you later.”

Magnus didn't reply, but simply smiled at him.

“I mean, if that's okay with you.” “Of course it is! Why would I give you my number if I didn't want you to call me?”

 

They both burst into a fit of giggles, “Oh god, I'm sorry I'm so awkward!”

“It's perfectly fine, it's rather adorable to be completely honest.” Magnus had not moved away yet.

Alec found himself staring at his lips, wondering if they were as soft as they looked. Magnus was slightly shorter than Alec, and it would not take any effort to lean down and… _I AM NOT KISSING A MAN I LITERALLY JUST MET._

 

Alec cleared his throat and took a step back. “So, yea, I'll call you later. Maybe we could go out for a drink or something?”  For a split second, Magnus looked unsettled, but

that passed very quickly as Magnus chuckled. “Yes, that sounds like an excellent idea. I'll see you around, pretty boy.”  

 

Magnus left, and Alec was left in the boardroom alone, slightly confused, and utterly intrigued.

 

_Wow._

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's really fluffy now but I can promise you we'll all suffer later ;)

**Author's Note:**

> Welp, I hope you enjoyed this first chapter! I've never read the books so my interpretation of Ragnor is based off the show and other fics I've read. I'm really excited to continue working on this!  
> Both the title of the fic and the chapter are named after two songs by K.flay which gave me the idea for the story ^-^  
> And don't worry, we'll see Alec and everyone else in the upcoming chapters.


End file.
